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Submissions Please
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!
Go Directly to:
Our web site is getting massive. So we will always include this handy little pull-down menu in our newsletter and on our main page. Go discover the world's most massive online tribute to duct tape:

Quote of the Month:
"I believe it will be a really short newsletter this month. We have to focus on our Presidential run." - Jim and Tim, the Duct Tape Guys

Soapbox presents Tim's personal opinions about issues that he feels are of importance.
It has challenging stuff to think about during your duct taping projects. If you want a dose of stuff to think about click here. If you don't want to, that's okay. Tape on! Here is a brief intro to what's in this month's SOAPBOX:

No comment this month...
Brush up on another take on current events via reinform.org - stuff you won't necessarily find in the mainstream media.

Music to Duct Tape by...
Here's another cool online free radio service - no commercials - pay as you please and pick whatever music genre you want. accuradio.com

Are you on our e-mail list?
Click here - to subscribe. Then MAKE SURE you respond to the verification email that comes your way after you subscribe to make sure your email is activated in the system. Remember, we never sell or share our list with anyone and you can easily unsubscribe at any time. - Jim and Tim

Do you eBay?
No? Well, how about if you could nab some genuine Duct Tape Guy props (retired), with books and videos to boot? Click to see what our current offering on eBay is by clicking to our Duct Tape Guys on eBay page (items change without notice). Next up: Tim's Wallet - stay tuned!

It's Stuck at Prom Time Again!

The Duck® brand duct tape Stuck at Prom® Scholarship Contest once again challenges high school students to create and accessorize their prom formalwear with America's favorite fix-all - duct tape. And, for the first time, this year it's the public's choice as to who's got the hottest fashions. Online public voting will decide the winning couple from the top 10 finalists. The couple winning the first place title will recieve a $6000 cash scholarship for college!

So, get your plans drawn up, go out and stock up on any or all of Duck® brand's 20 colors and patterns of duct tape and get busy creating YOUR winning prom outfit.

The contest will start on March 5th, 2007 (This is your advance warning from the Duct Tape Guys). Complete information is online at StuckAtProm.com and we will have more information in the March newsletter as well. For inspiration, visit our duct tape prom fashion gallery.
February 2007 - shortest month, shortest newsletter

MAJOR IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT FROM THE DUCT TAPE GUYS - RIGHT NOW! CLICK HERE!
We won't ruin the surprise, you will have to watch the video. And, when you do, make SURE you tell your friends about it. Thanks - see you in a minute.

Okay - we're back. Pretty exciting news, huh? Here is more exciting news - there is a group of brothers who made a kick-butt video in hopes of getting it on the SuperBowl as a Doritos commercial. Take a look - click the link below:

This newsletter is sponsored in part by Duck brand Duct Tape - Home of The Original Duck Tape Club.

Dale's Discoveries
(A monthly feature that will be showcasing weird stuff that our friend Dale comes up with.) Visit Dale's TallToysTroupe site

My niece was looking at a catalogue of "Christian Underwear" and noticed one that said, "Do Not Remove Until Marriage". She said, "Man, that is going to stink!!".

There is a national pizza delivery chain which has as a slogan "One Call Does it All". Isn't that normally how many times you have to call a pizza delivery place? I mean, it's not like you have to keep calling them over and over again until they finally decide to break down and bring you your pizza.

Speaking of food, I bought a can of cashews and saw that, on the side of the can, it said, "Satisfies Hunger". I'll bet that the people who write advertising for other foods are kicking themselves for not thinking of saying that about their product. Just think of the market they could have had if they had only targeted people who buy food because they are hungry.

Dale's Website Discovery of the Month

Normally I like to pick one huge website which can give you hours' worth of things to pour over and which has an appeal to a specific audience. This month, I have given four rather short sites which will appeal to perhaps a wider range of people.

First, for those of you with a literary bent, there is the One Look Reverse Dictionary. Among other things, this can help you find the perfect word when you are writing your novel. It also does quite a few more things and possibly you actually can spend hours putting in various things and viewing the results. Nevertheless, I am still going to give you the other three sites as a bonus... no extra charge.

http://onelook.com/reverse-dictionary.shtml

And, in the same literary vein:
http://www.apostrophe.fsnet.co.uk/

Finally, for the rest of you:
Men Who Look Like Kenny Rogers
Chuck Norris Facts

Thanks to Nick J. for two of the above (I will not reveal which two in order to protect the innocent).

====
Hey, Dale - I wanna add one more:
French Movie Promo - March of the Penguins (emperors) - Tim
Meet us at The Duct Tape Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.

The Diner is Closed for Remodeling - back next month.

It's also a short humor month...

A Baptist Preacher was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane took off, the cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him.

The flight attendant then asked the  preacher if he would like a drink.

Appalled, the preacher replied, "I'd rather  be tied up and taken advantage of by women of ill-repute, than let liquor touch  my lips."

The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and  said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice....

Three Rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower – Pete, KC, and Cooter. As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed. As the ambulance takes the body away, Pete says, "Well, damn, someone should go and tell his wife."
KC says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."
Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.
Pete says, "Where did you get that beer, KC?"
"Cooter's wife gave it to me," KC replies.
"That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"
"Well, not exactly," KC says. "When she answered the door, I said to her, you must be Cooter's widow."
She said, "You must be mistaken, I'm not a widow."
Then I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are."

Yesterday I was having some work done at the car dealer. A blonde woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.  They all looked at each other, and the mechanic asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"
She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine. I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there."  The mechanic gave the woman a piece of paper and a pen and Asked her to draw what
the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710.  He then took her over to another car which had the hood up and asked, "Is there a 710 on this car?"
She pointed and said, "Of course, it's right there."

Click here to listen to the Duct Tape Guys early radio bits, "Duct Tape Talk".
Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/list so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.

If you want OFF of our email list at any time, that’s fine with us, we don’t want to bother anyone with stuff they don't want. Just click the list link above and follow the unsubscribe instructions - don't send us an email asking us to remove you - we have no control over the list - you must click the link above or on your email notification to unsubscribe. Thanks.

May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06, 3/06, 4/06, 5/06, 6/06, 7/06, 8/06, 9/06,10/06,11/06, 12/06, 1/07,
Tim (left), Jim (other left).