The "BADGE of HONOR" If you've sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails.
Submissions Please
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!

Click to our Duct Tape Pro Shop apparel page for more information. Remember that you get a free flatpack of Duck® tape with your order while supplies last!

Are you on our Emailing List? Subscribe Now! (We have totally scrapped our old list, and are now using a new, steamlined list that will allow you to subscribe and unsubscribe more easily.) Click here to get on the new list now! If you are getting our emails and don't want to, you need to click on the link above and follow the remove instructions (there is no way that we can remove your email for you).

When you're at the Pro Shop, make sure you check out our new cool apparel and merchandise (stuff) section, too! We even have duct tape lunch boxes!

Quotes of the month:
“I do not believe in telling people of one's faith, especially with a view to conversion. Faith must be lived, and when it is, it becomes self-propagating.” - Mohandas K. Gandhi

"With all respect to Mr. Gandhi, we reserve the right to try to convert people to duct tape." - Jim and Tim


Soapbox: Outfoxed.
The media may not be as "liberal" as we are lead to think it is. This election year, it is of the utmost importance to make sure that we are being truthfully and fully informed about issues and candidates so we can make informed choices on our own - and not prescribed and force-fed us by any particular ideology. "Outfoxed" is a new documentary that examines how media empires, led by Rupert Murdoch's Fox News, have been promoting their own agenda in their television news passing it off as journalism. This film provides an in-depth look at Fox News and the dangers of ever-enlarging corporations taking control of the public's right to know.
Watch the trailer online: click here. The web site also provides some action items that you can do as a citizen to help put an end to biased journalism and make an appeal for truly objective reporting.

Trivia: Did you know that McDonald's, the world's largest user of beef, makes most of its profits from Coke, with a 91 percent gross profit margin? - source: www.foodfirst.org


August 2004 Edition

Our store just got bigger!

We've just launched a massive new store filled with their books and videos (just as before) but now have added a ton of new stuff!
More clothing styles, added size range (including infants and toddlers to a jumbo 4X) and women's styles (baby doll tees, camisoles and tank tops). AND, a mess of other STUFF - bumperstickers, bibs, mousepads, flying discs, mugs, travel mugs, license plate frames, even lunchboxes and a shirt for your pooch!
All items are imprinted with our creative duct tape graphics. You've gotta see it! It's been getting RAVE REVIEWS!
Click here for a look at our new store: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/store

Special Discount to our newsletter subscribers:
When you order any (non-book or video) items from our newly redone store, you can get a $5 discount on orders over $45 or more. Just click here and follow the link and coupon code instructions. This is a secret link for our subscribers only (although you can pass the information along to your friends if you would like).

UK Duct Tapers Unite!
There is duct tape use in England (as you can see in this and other duct tape sightings from the UK). But, it seems that there is at least one lonely duct taper in England; Simon. He asked that we post this message in an effort to get UK Duct Tapers together. Happy to oblige, Jim and I love the UK! We've been there twice and can't wait to get back!

"Duct tape is used by UK folks too.  If fellow UK duct tapers want to find some solidarity please feel free to contact me at simon.richert@btinternet.com.  I admit to being a duct tape devotee and would love to hear from other UK duct tapers in the same boat." - Simon

We hope you find some companionship in your wonderful addiction, Simon. Cheers, mate!

A bit of related trivia. Did you know that a London cab driver is required to learn all of London's streets, byways, lanes, roadways, etc.? The "knowledge," as it is called takes two years. MRI scans have found that the process actually changes the shape of the driver's hippocampus, the area of the brain where new memories of places are stored. - Based on an article by Nicholas Wade, NY Times Perhaps they can retain the shape of their brain if they tightly duct tape around their head before they begin acquiring the knowledge. - The Duct Tape Guys

Bored? Practical Joking with Duct Tape Here's a prank you can use at a mall. Get a six foot long piece of toilet paper and lay it on the floor just outside the restroom door. On the end nearest the door, attach a little square of duct tape (sticky-side up) with half of the sticky side exposed. When someone leaves the restroom, they will step on the taped toilet paper and start dragging it behind them down the mall. (Repeat as often as needed for mall fun.)

Like this prank? You will find a ton more in Tim's new book, "The Practical Joker's Handbook." It's available at your favorite bookstore now, or buy it online and get a free Whoopee Cushion to boot! Click to www.practicaljokebook.com for more jokes and ordering information.

Oh, make sure you check out my Practical Joker's Kit - which includes practical joking basics (Like a rubber doggy doo, whoopee cushion, bar bet book, a device to make your beverage can or bottle float (really light beer?) and a little device to give your burger or steak a heart beat - this joke has actually gotten me a few free meals!). It's all great fun! - Tim

Ona Paul: Duct Tape Fabric Artist (right) Check out Ona's cool purses and stuff - she is definitely a gifted fabric artist who's detoured into duct tape fashion accessories. Her preference is (like ours) Duck® brand duct tape for color selection and quality. We've posted a page just for her in our fashion accessories section. Click here.



Meet us at The Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.

Just like these people did:

Duct Wars I am an amateur filmmaker and my friends and I have created four movies titled "Duct Wars". The main plot originally is Duct Tape versus Masking tape (showing that Duct Tape dominates). Thus we got Ductorian people verses the Masked people. The 4 movies show the Ductorians fighting against the Masked people that are trying to destroy them. The fourth movie we just finished and are extremely proud of, We called it Duct Wars IV, Midnight Shadows. It is 1.5 hours long and took roughly 2 years to produce.

My friends and I love Duct Tape and together have made Duct Tape vests, trench coats, wallets, Duct Sabers, and use duct tape in most props within the movie. The duct tape keeps the props together. We also use different colored Duct Tape to make crazy custom designs on things such as posters and ice skates.

If you are interested in learning more about Duct Wars you can visit our site at http://www.ductwars.com - Chris Thombs, DCJ Productions

Golf Travel Bag Strap Holder When Jim travels with his golf clubs he doesn't trust his babies to the strength of ratchet straps! No sir! It's duct tape on top of the strap latches to provide an extra ounce of protection from the baggage handlers' abuse.

Duct Tape Rope Here is picture is of a piece of rope that I made out of duct tape. I was working at a Boy Scout summer camp. One of the things we teach the scouts how to do is make rope. One day it occurred to me to make rope out of duct tape. This 1' long piece of rope used 3' of tape to make. - Greg, Ridgecrest, CA


Shirt of the Month:
Those who have "earned their degree" in duct taping deserve a t-shirt or jersey from their alma mater. Click to the Duct Tape Pro Shop for this and other shirt designs that are perfect gifts when given with a roll of duct tape and one or more of our books!

Your caption?

Click to enter our photo caption contest! Click the link to see our previous monthly caption contest winners, too!



Did you read the book on...
...Modesty? Read it? I wrote it!
...Procrastination? Not yet.
...Sexism in the office? No, but I'll have my girl pick me up a copy on her lunch hour.
...
Paranoia? No. Why do you ask?

Gendered Products?
You may not know that many non-living things have a gender. For example...

1) Ziploc Bags -- They are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

2) Copiers -- They are Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

3) Tire -- Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.

4) Hot Air Balloon -- Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part.

5) Sponges -- Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water.

6) Web Page -- Female, because it's always getting hit on.

7) Subway -- Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

8) Hourglass -- Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

9) Hammer -- Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

10) Remote Control - - Female......
Ha! You thought it'd be male. But,  consider this -- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.

Thanks to Dale Peterson for sending this one. check out Dale's Tall Toys Troupe web site.


Click here to see Tim's latest Duct Tape Pros cartoons.

You can tell it's a classy golf course when you find this in the men's room!

See all of our duct tape sightings from around the world at our duct tape sightings pages. Got some sightings of your own? Don't be shy, send them our way!


RANDOM WINNER: The random winner of a duct tape book in this issue: Randy Moline - Congratulations! Send us your mailing address and we will send you an autographed Duct Tape Book.

Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/list so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.

If you want OFF of our email list at any time, that’s fine with us, we don’t want to bother anyone with stuff they don't want. Just click the list link above and follow the unsubscribe instructions.

May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04,

Tim (left), Jim (other left).