The “BADGE of HONOR” If you have sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails.

Speaking of a great gift for mom... Pick up a copy of our latest book at your local bookstore (if they don't have it appropriately displayed, rearrange their store for us). Or, you can avoid leaving your house and get an autographed copy today from the Duct Tape Pro Shop (we'll even through in a complimentary Duct Tape Pro Bumper Sticker).

Click here to become acquainted with our new book:
www.ductshui.com
(Can you believe that nobody had that URL? Amazing!)

Grab the image above and email it to Mom... you won't need to buy a card.
Top Ten List features Duct Tape uses for Mother's Day:
10. Duct Tape flowers on last year's Father's Day card converts it to a Mother's Day card.
9. Duct Tape the kid’s feet, sticky-side-out, and they’ll be doing the vacuuming as they run around the house.
(click here for the complete list)

Religiously changing Your light bulbs...
How many people to change a light bulb?
Charismatics: Only one. Hands already in the air.
Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.
Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how
much better the old one was.
Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.
Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.
Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.
Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.
Amish: What's a light bulb?

NOT FUNNY BUT...
We've been hearing a lot about the Lawrence Berkeley Lab study that says duct tape is no good on duct work. While that study doesn't bother us (we've written five books and eight Page-A-Day® Calendars about duct tape and don't mention duct work once), we thought you may want to become acquainted with this controversial study. You could print it out and use it as kindling for your next bonfire. Click here to read the study.

QUOTE O’ the ISSUE: "The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner." - Roseanne

Shopping Warning: MOTHER’S DAY: MAY 12th, FATHER’S DAY: JUNE 16th.
Here is your chance to save big time on all SIX of our Books and our video!
In this newsletter-only offer, you can get our first three Duct Tape Books, our WD-40 Book, The Jumbo Duct Tape Book, and Duct Shui (a combined retail value of $56.75) for just $42.00! A great gift for your Duct Tape and WD-40 loving mom or dad for their special day(s) this spring. Or, heck, just get it for yourself. Everything (except the video) will be autographed to the person of your choice. And, both the Jumbo Duct Tape Book and Video have coupons for FREE flat packs of Duck® brand Tape - making this even a better deal. To get the special offer click here and you will be ordering securely online via CCNOW.


You can always get stuff from the Duct Tape Guys FREE. Postcards, bumper stickers, computer monitor desktops, even books! Check out our FREE STUFF area by clicking on the icon on the left.
Note: Some of you have sent requests without a self-addressed STAMPED envelope (SASE). Sorry, but these requests are NOT filled by our fulfillment person. So please remember to include a SASE!

(left) This couple from Soldiers Grove, Wisconsin models their medieval duct tape prom fashions. they are entered in Duck® brand's "Stuck at Prom" contest... Are you? Click the photo to see entrants from last year's contest.

Meet us at The Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories. Just like these people did:

Camper's Constant Companion I was camping up in the mountains with my step-dad. We decided to go for a walk around the lake with our dog. As we hit a patch of tall grass, my step-dad and I took different routes. The grass was so tall that I was unable to see a knee-deep puddle of water that was directly in front of me, needless to say, I fell in, soaking my shoes. By the time I reached camp my feet had many blisters and my shoes were still soaked. Not wanting to walk around in wet shoes, I took a pair of socks, and my good friend, Duct Tape, and started making a new pair of shoes. The rest of the trip was fine, my shoes didn't dry out, but I didn't care because the Duct Tape shoes worked just as well if not better!
I have also used duct tape to combine tarps to make canopies while camping, fix interiors, notebooks, backpacks, inflata-boats, fishing poles, and everything else. Simply put: Duct Tape fixes EVERYTHING! (Even broken hearts, I gave my girlfriend a bouquet of duct tape flowers, she loved them!) --- Brandon H.- Salem, Oregon

Avoiding Germs You can easily use duct tape to pick up those used tissues your kids leave around during cold season without getting your hands dirty. --- Mike P.


PHOTO OF THE MONTH

Real Life Flight Announcements:
"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child pick your favorite."
(left) Even NASA relies on duct tape to accomplish their missions. Here is the Apollo 17 lunar rover featuring a "fender" created with a map and duct tape. Check out more NASA duct tape information here.

Speaking of photos… Our new photo caption contest photo is waiting for your creative caption. Click here to try your luck and skill at writing a caption for this month's photo (deadline is May 28th).


RANDOM WINNER: The random winner of a duct tape book in this issue is/was: Aaron Hurd. Congratulations! Send us your mailing address and we will send you an autographed Duct Tape Book.

Well, that’s it for this issue of “Duct Tape on a Roll” Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/onaroll so they can SUBSCRIBE.

If you want OFF of our email list at any time, that’s fine with us, we don’t want to bother anyone with stuff they don't want. Just click here: REMOVE

May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Catch us in action in your area! Check out our appearance calendar!

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02