Duct Tape on a Roll - July 2004 edition

			The "BADGE of HONOR" If you've sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails. Submissions Please If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again! Click to our Duct Tape Pro Shop apparel page for more information. Remember that you get a free flatpack of Duck® tape with your order while supplies last! NEW Emailing List. Subscribe Now! (We have totally scrapped our old list, and are now using a new, steamlined list that will allow you to subscribe and unsubscribe more easily.) Click here to get on the new list now! If you are getting our emails and don't want to, you need to click on the link above and follow the remove instructions (there is no way that we can remove your email for you). *When you're at the Pro Shop, make sure you check out our cool apparel, too.* Quote of the month: "ME...ME say I'm sorry! Kings never say 'I'm sorry!' And I am the mightiest king in all the world!" Bartholomew looked the King square in the eye. "You may be a mighty king," he said. "But you're sitting in oobleck up to your chin. And so is everyone in your land. And if you won't even say you're sorry, you're no sort of a king at all!" - Dr. Seuss, Bartholomew and the Oobleck Soapbox: Fahrenheit 9/11. See it. Then form your own opinion, and by all means VOTE! If you are under 18, you can still get politically involved. Enough said. Moore info click here.

*July 2004 Edition* Show your colors. Happy Independence Day/Month. You can dress for the Fourth of July parade in weatherproof red, white and blue splendor using Duck® brand duct tape. Check out these patriotic outfits created by some of the 2004 "Stuck at Prom" contestants (see Stuck at Prom below). Stuck at Prom The 2004 Stuck at Prom contest is over and the voting is now tallied. Our winners this year were Kris and Caitlyn from Oklahoma (pictured below). Congratulations! You can check out many hundreds of the entries in our fashions area. Click here to access the Prom viewer. We can't get over the variety and quality of the duct tape promwear. The submissions are getting better and better every year (which makes the competition and judging harder and harder). We wish that there were about one hundred prizes available to award you guys for your excellent efforts. So click to our prom viewer and be amazed! And,for you who are planning on attending your Junior/Senior prom in duct tape apparel, get inspired and get working now! We have the top three and Top of the Tape award winners labeled in our viewer. (You can scroll backwards if you don't want to go through previous years before you get to 2004.) What's new on the duct tape web site? We're always adding stuff in the Duct Tape Diner (see samples below), and the Bodyshop on a Roll areas (we're particularily proud of this page's sponsor, The Tom Ridge Autoglass Replacement Company). We have also added "Duct Tape Gone Wrong" a recognition of the darker side of duct tape. Perhaps the best way to discover the far-reaching corners of our site is to use the pull-down menu on our front page. As always, if you have stuff that you would like to contribute, feel free! Just follow the directions on our "Submit" page. Who knows, your submission might make it into one of our upcoming books or calendars. Tape on, dudes! - The Duct Tape Guys Avon Heritage Duct Tape Festival The festival was great! (Jim and I didn't even regret missing Father's Day to be there.) We met a ton of nice people (all duct tape users), and saw a lot of neat duct tape art and fashions. Click here to see some photos from the festival.

Meet us at The Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.

Just like these people did:

Beer Carrier on a Roll I had a 24-pack of Bud that I drank a few out of. Now I had 20 cans in a case that was open at 1 end and needed an easy way to carry it over to my buddy's place. So, I pulled out my duct tape and made myself a convienient handle. I'm sure it's not the funniest use you guys have been emailed, but who can't relate to this?! - Jarod

Change Collector I have a small double-decker washer/dryer unit. The wash basket is narrow and frequently, loose change ends up in the bottom, just barely visable... poking out from under the agitator skirt. I can not get my fingers under there to retrieve the change...and only succeed at pushing the coins back and forth. I thought to get a piece of duct tape and slide the end of it under the agitator...and I am then able to pick up the coins. - Torre

Silly Putty and Duct Tape Cool the Feet Where I work is 16 air conditioners on the black tar roof. The roof surface can be 130° F and gets very uncomfortable for the feets. I made the silly putty molded to my shoes then froze it. when I go to the roof I duct tape the frozen molds to the top of my shoes. Feets Coolers! They last only 30 minutes in that heat, but that's 30 miinutes before my shoes are filled and sweat and my feets get soft boiled. - Larry A.

Shirt of the Month:
Perfect for the weight-watching duct tape lover in your life.
"Lo Carb Duct Tape" - combines humor and duct tape for a shirt that will get a ton of chuckles from all those who see it. Great conversation starter. Click to the Duct Tape Pro Shop for this and other shirt designs that are perfect gifts when given with a roll of duct tape and one or more of our books!



	Your caption? Click to enter our photo caption contest! Click the link to see our previous monthly caption contest winners, too!

Why Men Are Happier People
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be president.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character
Wedding dress $5000, Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood - all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 45 minutes.
No wonder men are happier

Click here to see Tim's latest Duct Tape Pros cartoons.




	See all of our duct tape sightings from around the world at our duct tape sightings pages. Got some sightings of your own? Don't be shy, send them our way!


		RANDOM WINNER: The random winner of a duct tape book in this issue: Sid Veenstra - Congratulations! Send us your mailing address and we will send you an autographed Duct Tape Book. Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/list so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list. If you want OFF of our email list at any time, that’s fine with us, we don’t want to bother anyone with stuff they don't want. Just click the list link above and follow the unsubscribe instructions. May the Tape be with you! - Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys Click here for archived *On a Roll* Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04,
Tim (left), Jim (other left).